What is there to do in a small town?

Erin and I are in Alta Vista Va, for a wedding this weekend. For some reason Erin is obsessed with making small town jokes about this little place, but I think she has forgotten her roots.

We grew up in Arcade NY where...
1. there are more cows than people in Wyoming county
2. we dressed up in full camo for homecoming football games
3. there is only one high school where the district is more than 25 miles across
4. there are only 2 fast food joints - McDonald's and Burger King
5. High school teachers can be considered "wealthy"
6. the police dept had 3 cop cars - 2 for off duty officers (check out the awesome animation on this site)
7. cool parties had bomfires
8. half of the school was "sick" on the first day of deer season

people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, (although I don't see a problem with lobbing a few)